What is bullying? I read an interesting article the other day and it confirmed everything that I have been saying for years about the term ‘bully’ or someone being ‘bullied’ because too many people think that they are being bullied when in fact they are not.
Don’t get me wrong, bullying is very real, and something that in today’s age with social media, absolutely devastating, however it is a word that is being thrown around far too much by far too many people who can’t seem to take criticism.
When your child is in the playground and they’re not getting along with someone, that’s life. I mean, take a moment and have a think, do you get along with everyone? No, you don’t. There will be people that you work with or family and friends that you may have a falling out with, that is just human nature, we are just not going to get along with everyone, no matter how hard we try. And seriously, we shouldn’t be wasting our energy on trying to.
What we need to be teaching our children is just that, you’re not going to get along with everyone, however that doesn’t mean that they are allowed to be mean to each other, they’re not. That also doesn’t mean that they have to put up with bad behavior by others. It’s about teaching them respect for other people, especially when they don’t agree with something that they may have said. However teaching our children that they have to be friends with everyone is not teaching them life skills and to be honest, just isn’t doable!
There are too many parents that think that they’re child is being bullied when in fact, it is just two kids not getting on and instead of labelling a child a bully or being bullied they should in the first instance, at least be taught the tools in how to deal with it. To understand that not everyone is going to like them and that is OK and it is OK for them not to like everyone.
I know people in supervisory roles who have a new young worker start and when they point out to them that they haven’t done their job correctly, they are told that they are ‘bullying!’ No, they are not, they are trying to tell you how to do your job and you just can’t handle criticism.
What is bullying? Well this is a quote from the article that I read and I LOVE it, I think it is the perfect explanation of human dynamics. Please copy it and print it out and put it on the back of the toilet door where the kids can see it every day as a reminder.
“When someone says or does something unintentionally hurtful and they do it once, that’s rude.
When someone says or does something intentionally hurtful and they do it once, that’s mean.
When someone says or does something intentionally hurtful and they keep doing it,- even when you tell then to stop or show them that you’re upset, that’s bullying.”
And in a nutshell my friends that is the best explanation of bullying that I have ever read! And a lot more people need to read it and understand it.