Well, I’ll tell you one thing and that’s love – whether self-love or loving someone else – is a verb.  It’s an action, it’s a thing we do.

Self-love is a term that’s thrown around a lot in this day and age.  You read memes about it such as:

“You need to love yourself more”

Or how about “you can’t love someone until you love yourself”.  Which I do have to say, is actually true.

How can you love someone and expect them to treat you with love and respect you, when you don’t do that for yourself?

When you take the time to really get to know yourself, to understand who you are and set boundaries that you expect others to stick to – that’s when you’re ready for someone to come into your life.

Until then, you’ll be looking for someone to fill a void, because you don’t want to be lonely.  When you get into a relationship with someone for those kinds of reasons, you’ll usually grab the first person that comes along and they’re not going to be the right person for you.

Your happiness and your life, is totally up to you.

So, what is self-love?

Is it buying a new wardrobe?  Or is it a special product you buy over the counter?

Maybe, it’s reading lots and lots of spiritual books!

While all of the above can make you feel good that actually isn’t self-love.

It’s when you appreciate yourself, including all of your good points, and also your not so good ones. 

Self love grows by the actions that you do to yourself.

By actions, I mean things that support your whole being – your physical, psychological and spiritual selves. 

It’s not just one thing, it’s the whole kit and caboodle!

It’s practicing self-care including sleep, eating and also intimacy.  As mentioned, it’s setting boundaries and living with true intentions, and very importantly, forgiving yourself.

It’s a truly dynamic thing, this self-love. 

When we start acting in ways that expand the self-love we have within us, it changes things in ways that you can’t imagine.

When you’re in the process of self-love you have more compassion for yourself as a human being and therefore more compassion for others.  You don’t need to explain away any of your faults.

Generally, your life will feel that it has purpose.

When you’re living and acting in self-love you’ll attract more people around you that will expand you and they in turn will help you be your best self.  Most importantly when you are in this place, then you’ll have healthy relationships with others.

Remember this, you can’t hate yourself happy.

You can’t criticize yourself thin.

And you also can’t shame yourself wealthy.

The changes you want to see in your life, begin with you and the first thing you need to do is start acting and living a life of self love.

Katrina-Jane