If you don’t know what your monkey mind is, it’s that inner dialogue that just doesn’t shut the fuck up. When you’re constantly going over things, again and again!

Maybe it’s telling you that you’re stupid or unworthy? Maybe it’s not letting go of something that someone said or did, even if it was years ago?

But it’s also all the silly little mundane things that we think about through the day, like:

“What will I cook for dinner”

“I wonder what mark I’m going to get on that test”

“Did I remember to pack an apple in the kid’s lunchbox”

All of it, all that incessant chatter is your monkey mind.

Buddha described the human mind as being so busy and overwhelmed, it was as if it had monkeys in it that continued to jump from branch to branch, chattering and screaming.

Sound like your mind? That’s where the phrase Monkey Mind comes from.  Those little monkeys (thoughts) in your head bouncing around all the time screeching their story.

Now, we all have that monkey mind and it’s not always a bad thing.  It allows us to think and do a number of things at once, stops us forgetting things and allows us to function.

But our poor brains do need a break just like our physical bodies do.

Here’s some tips for you to start quieting that monkey mind.

Just a note – you more than likely aren’t going to get it straight away, it takes time and practice!! So, don’t give up – keep at it.

• Meditate – a big one and one that we all need to do. It doesn’t have to be for a long period of time and if you struggle to meditate go with a guided meditation to start with to teach your mind how to let go of thoughts and just float.
• Acknowledge that you can control your monkey mind – you have control over your thoughts, so you can get it to calm down. It just needs practice.
• Live in the moment – I was chatting to my step-dad about my mum (she has dementia) and I said that she is the perfect example of how you live in the moment. No thought of the past, no thinking about the future.  She’s just focused on whatever it is that she’s doing in that point of time.  You can do this to, when you’re at work, just focus on the task at hand.  Don’t have your phone on or Facebook open.  When I’m doing emailed readings, my phone is on silent and off the desk and the only thing open are my emails – nothing else. I just zone in on doing that.
• Practice deep slow breathing. It helps calm the brain, believe it or not!  It’s also a technique that I used when I was going through anxiety to calm that fight or flight response before it got out of hand.  Count to five while breathing in through your nose, really filling your lungs.  Hold for a second and then breath out for the count of five, completely emptying your lungs.  Do this at least 3 times.
• Keep a journal, this is more about you keeping a track of what may trigger the monkey mind to get out of hand, so that you can see the patterns and then know how you can respond when it happens again.
• Learn to accept the past and move on. Difficult I know for some people as they like to hold onto that hurt, or they won’t let go because they want an apology that they’ll never get.  Do know this.  Everyone I’ve ever done a reading for has had a shit childhood, it wasn’t just you.  No family was like The Waltons or The Brady Bunch or whatever perfect family you watched on TV.  Our parents all made mistakes, just like we’re going to with our kids.  You need to accept that it happened.  Seek therapy if you need help with this, and let it go because holding onto all the hurt and anger feeds that monkey mind.
• Use mantras – think of things to repeatedly say when you feel that monkey mind taking off. There’s no right or wrong thing to say, as long as it’s something that helps calm the mind.  When I was suffering from depression and that monkey mind was rampant, I would sit there and say, “I’m happy, I’m fine, I’ve got control of this” and I would say that 100 times a day (not kidding!) and it helped. It helped me get through each day, even though at the time I wasn’t happy, fine or controlled!  I can honestly say that today I am! Some mantras that you might find suit your situation could be:

• I’ve done enough today
• Just breathe
• I love and accept myself.

One of the key things to implement in your life constantly is gratitude.  For every little thing that’s going on in your life, even the not so pleasant things because they will also have a positive.  I’ve just read a book and the author who survived the Holocaust and was at Auschwitz says that one of the things she did to survive was always look at the gift in every moment.

You’ll never stop your monkey mind, nor should you want to, but having control over it and allowing the chatter to stop is a huge step in having a calm and happy life.

Love & Light

Katrina x