the ‘selfishness’ of women
Just a follow on from the topics that we touched on through last week – I am going to ask you, why do women (and I’m sure some men do as well!) still ‘sacrifice’ themselves for the family? Now, I’m not saying go and dump your children and partner to follow your dream, because I firmly believe that we choose to be parents and therefore, we need to be with our children until they are old enough to cope without you.
Let me give you an example of what I’m trying to say. I have a facial once a month, it’s a treat to myself where I actually get to relax for an entire hour, once a month. I have mentioned this to acquaintances and friends in general conversation and usually the response is ‘you’re so lucky’. I’m lucky why? I work bloody hard throughout the month, I usually only have one day off a week, that is totally ‘work free’ so as far as I am concerned, I DESERVE to give myself a treat! I haven’t yet met anyone who says my husband is ‘lucky’ because he gets to play golf every Saturday!! It’s just assumed that as a male, he gets to do those things.
I want to know why?! In my first marriage, I made a rod for my own back and turned myself into a ‘slave’ that did absolutely everything around the house, I’ve learnt second time around! But, why is it OK for my husband to play golf every weekend but I’m ‘lucky’ to take 1 hour per month for myself? Why is it seen as OK for a husband/partner to go off and study to change careers and follow his dream, but it’s seen as being ‘selfish’ if the wife does it? Shouldn’t the husband/partner be doing whatever they can to help support their wife in following her dreams, sure you may have to take turns at it, him first her second or vice versa, but when I put up the comment last week, so many women saw it as being ‘selfish’ to the family for taking time out to study.
Sure, I understand if finances are tight, but if they’re tight does your husband still have a hobby that he does each week, but you don’t do anything because you’re concerned about finances? If finances are tight buy you have a dream you want to follow, maybe the whole family needs to get behind you and make sacrifices, children don’t need everything that opens and shuts, what they need is a loving and safe environment. And don’t forget we’re not talking forever here, we’re talking about 4 years probably maximum if you study full-time (and full-time uni study is NOT full-time like work!) for then a countless number of years that you would be enjoying what you do!!!!
I just find it amazing that we are in the year 2013 in the 21st century yet women still seem to think that it is ‘selfish’ to think of themselves!!! Yet, it’s OK for the guys to do what they want!! C’mon folks, really?????
I would love to hear your thoughts – from the guys as well!!!
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