How do you stop being so hard on yourself? What do you think I mean when I ask you to stop being so hard on yourself?

I don’t mean you shouldn’t try and be healthy and be the best version of yourself that you can be, because that’s important, but you need to stop being so hard on yourself!!

What I mean is this – that you don’t constantly change who you think you are, so that others will accept you, look up to you or like you.

Stop keeping up with the Jones’.

When you stop being so hard on yourself, you start accepting you for who you are.

The beauty industry don’t want you to have confidence they want you to think that you’re not good enough.

You’re teeth aren’t white enough, boobs not big enough (or maybe too big) your bum is too small or too big, you’re skin not clear enough, and heaven help you if you have wrinkles!

We have become a society that is constantly thinking you need to be a different version of you. That you need to constantly be something more.

When, in reality you are perfect as you are.

Accept yourselves just as you are, those big industries would make absolutely no money if you did that and that’s not their goal.

They seriously don’t give a fuck about you looking ‘perfect’ they want you to feel that you’re not good enough so they make money, lots and lots of money.

On TV the other day was a woman who, obviously felt that she wasn’t good enough accept and embrace her age and natural beauty because she had fake boobs, fillers in her lips and Botox – she was incapable of any any expression on her face at ALL!!!

The only way I could tell she was happy is because she gave a kind of laugh but even that was restricted because of all the work that she’s had done.

She’d turned herself into a caricature of herself.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t have plastic surgery but what I’m saying is if you accepted yourself as you are, appreciated every aspect of yourself both the good and the not so good, you wouldn’t need to have plastic surgery.

You need to be comfortable in your own skin.

No-one is perfect, there is no such thing, we’re all different and that’s what’s so wonderful.

This is about embracing your life, not worrying what others think about you, stop comparing yourself to others because they’re on their own journey.

You don’t gain value by your appearance .

So lower that stupid bar you’ve set yourself because any ‘flaws’ you think you have are what make you human.

And most importantly they are what make you, you. Why in god’s name are you trying to look and be like everyone else?

Don’t try and blend in and be the same, stand tall and proud and just be happy to be you.

You are valuable just as you are – and remember confident women lift up other women they don’t tear them down.

When someone feels shit about themselves, they are more likely to make a negative remark about someone else. And that’s just sad for them, isn’t it?

So, go and look in that mirror and love every wrinkle and wobbly bit.

Thank your legs for walking you around because there are millions that would give anything for you legs so that they could walk.

Have stretch marks because you grew a baby? then touch them and thank them for being there because there are thousands of women that would give anything to have those stretch marks because they can’t have children.

Thank your arms that they are able to wrap around those you love and hug them.

Have wrinkles? That’s because you’ve lived a life, and you’ve laughed and cried.

Be the best that you can be for you, and stop being so hard on yourself.